I'm losing the will to continue
I suppose the role my blogs serve, is to point out just how half empty the glass is. Or as Bart Simpson said ‘Can’t win don’t try’
What is the effin’ point of the white elephant gift exchange? Let’s make everyone at work go drop ten bucks on a gag gift for no one in particular, and then we’ll exchange them so each of us winds up with a piece of garbage.
Whenever you try and opt out of these compulsory ‘activities’ you are the asshole. What a time waste. I don’t mind kicking in my share, but I hate stupid shit and this qualifies.
Oh and eff pot luck too. I’m not cooking for you clowns, and certainly there are some of you who’s food I wouldn’t trust. I just know too much about your habits.
Coworkers pot luck is commin’ to town (trad. arrangement)
I know you don’t flush the urinal
I know you pick your nose
I know that you’ve been foul all day
So forgive me if I don’t eat your food…
Ohhhhhhh eff it.
I’m ragin’ full on scrooge.
What is the effin’ point of the white elephant gift exchange? Let’s make everyone at work go drop ten bucks on a gag gift for no one in particular, and then we’ll exchange them so each of us winds up with a piece of garbage.
Whenever you try and opt out of these compulsory ‘activities’ you are the asshole. What a time waste. I don’t mind kicking in my share, but I hate stupid shit and this qualifies.
Oh and eff pot luck too. I’m not cooking for you clowns, and certainly there are some of you who’s food I wouldn’t trust. I just know too much about your habits.
Coworkers pot luck is commin’ to town (trad. arrangement)
I know you don’t flush the urinal
I know you pick your nose
I know that you’ve been foul all day
So forgive me if I don’t eat your food…
Ohhhhhhh eff it.
I’m ragin’ full on scrooge.
posted by Robert_M at 8:15 AM
2 Comments:
I opt out of the gift exchange every year and I get dirty looks every time the sign up sheet gets passed around. Look --- I don't even give Christmas gifts to my friends (way too much obligation), why would I buy a gift for some random spare human that I'm thrown together with by virtue of the fact that we work in the same office?
This year was especially painful. The gift exchange took place in the office meeting room. And all during the exchange it was full f'n volume of female cackling (apparantly, some gag gift was especially hilarious) while I'm trying to make work phone calls.
Then it was on to the office Christmas party, which was held at a bar next door. I actually look forward to this every year because it involves free booze, food, a bit of comeraderie that isn't that forced and the opportunity to go home a few hours early.
But this year, the Christmas party had to be tricked up. We had an audience participation "murder mystery" which was scripted and directed by three community theater types hired for the occassion. Half the staff had "roles" in the murder mystery. So 20 minutes into the dinner, these actors come out and start into their irratating script. By then, I'm on my second double gin & tonic and even that doesn't relieve the pain. So I pick up my jacket and make my way to the door, less than an hour after the party started. Another round of dirty looks get shot my way, but I figure if I stayed any longer, there'd be a real murder, with no mystery at all attached to it.
It is probably the wives of the nose-pickers and non-flushers that are making the food, and if they don't have wives, they will probably pick up something at Einsteins or Boston Market. I doubt if these foul people you describe are gonna take the time to cook something themselves.
White elephant is lame, but it is just an attempt at doing something fun in the workplace. Nobody is doing it to try to make you miserable, and some people actually like that stuff.
Be glad this only happens once a year at your office. When I was a teacher, we had to have secret pals (one gift per month), and I was constantly having to pitch in for someone's wedding or baby shower.
You should really come and have lunch with me and John sometime. It seems like you could use a little dose of fun and good times.
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